My name is Charles, and I am a grateful alcoholic.

First, living sober is a life sentence. Not a death sentence, you know? I am truly amazed at the miracles in my life since I got sober, and I'm not even at three years yet. Don't get me wrong ... pink cloud time ended at about nine months for me .. but there is absolutely nothing going on in my life that would be improved by adding alcohol, and so many precious things that it would destroy. I didn't want to give in to AA; didn't want to admit defeat; didn't want to face a lifetime of reality, selfishness and fear. The grip of a disease I didn't want to admit existed, much less admit I had. But in surrendering to my disease I have found that the truth is, I don't need alcohol. Period. And freedom from alcohol is the greatest freedom I know. My life is my own again, and I have a God of my understanding for the first time in my life. I have a day by day, moment by moment, relationship with a Higher Power. Wanting it didn't bring Him into my life. Wanting to get into Heaven didn't make me believe. What brought me to this state of Grace was being forced to rely on God. And not only surviving when I did, but thriving when I did. I don't believe in God because I want to get into Heaven. I believe because He released me from Hell ... the Hell I created for myself every time I put alcohol into my body, and the Hell that I created in my own alcoholic mind whether I drank or not. Living sober is like being born again. I feel like I have awakened from decades of a nightmare. And while the difficulties and crises are still there, I am starting to learn how to handle them without even thinking of crawling back into a bottle. And the friends I am making in AA, the times we spend together, the stories we share, the progress we make in each others company ... these are what it is to truly live a blessed life. Living sober is not to be feared or endured, but treasured.