Greetings fellow AA journeyers! My name is Lu, and I'm an alcoholic.

Grateful to be sober today. I just left an AAOnline meeting with the topic: "Letting Go." This has been one of the AA tools that's been a lifesaver for me many times over. One example is when I moved into a high-rise for the disabled. Letting go of some dreams (to make room for new ones) and images of myself as I wished to be (to make room for accepting myself as I am) were challenging. The lease we have to sign agrees to all sorts of inspections of our homes (looking in closets, drawers, under beds, refrigerators, any and every place). At first, this felt invasive and violating. Mega-inner turmoil came into play, such as old tapes of victimization and things that once would have led to a drink. But AA offered me another option: "Let it go." I wrestled with how to do that, and I'm not sure exactly when the transformation began ... maybe simply with the possibility of it not being the big deal it felt like. Gradually, I let the inspections begin to work for me. Nowadays, when they do the biggest one and give three weeks' warning, I use it as a goal to do spring cleaning and map out a plan that gets me where I want to be when I need to be there, without major stresses. And in between times, I simply do a little each day. I do it for myself today, and not for 'them.' Whenever they don't show up when they promise, I don't have any resentments about it, either. As for waiting for them on the actual inspection day, I'm now able to fix a fresh pot of coffee, listen to some meditation music, write AA pen-pals, and simply enjoy the day and my clean home. None of this would be possible without sobriety, AA tools, and an entirely new way of looking at things. All very WOW-ing ODAAT stuff!

Thanks for allowing me to share, and for being on the journey with me. Blessings all around.