My name is Heather, and I'm an alcoholic.

I spent a good part of my life trying to hide from other people and from God. I can't say I ever tried to take just one drink. My drinking had a purpose, to get me out of reality. When I came to my first meeting, I was really looking for how to get it under some kind of control. I kept experimenting my first two years, and shunning other AA's, trying my best to hide from my Higher Power. Then, I got to a point where I realized there was absolutely no control at all. I was finally able to do Step One, I guess. Since I had spent so much time trying to hide from humanity, I had a really hard time learning how to open up to others. I had always used the alcohol for that. But luckily for me, the people in the rooms understood exactly how I was, and accepted me anyway, defects and all. They are teaching me how to relate to reality without the bottle. My first drink was deadly, especially at the end of it. I am just grateful that there really was a way out when I was finally ready to open the door and let the Steps in.

Thanks to all for being here.