My name is Brooke and I'm a grateful, recovering alcoholic.

When I was just beginning to be an active sponsor in AA, I would spend a lot of time and energy trying to carry the message of sobriety to newcomers. I wanted them to receive the gifts of living a sober life the way that I had, such as being able to live in your own skin and finding inner peace. What I found was that almost all went back out into the drinking world. At first this was frustrating beyond words -- I wanted to walk away and never devote another hour to any of these people. However, some wise old-timers pointed out that my sponsorship efforts were not for those newcomers but they were for me. At first I didn't understand, but the meaning of their words gradually sunk in and I finally understood. I was developing and strengthening my own new way of living. The bottom line is: I stayed sober. I was able to recover and build a new life by staying focused on the thoughts and actions that reinforced this and made it possible. What a paradoxical gift! I no longer resented the 'sponsees' nor the time I had spent with those who had gone back out, in spite of my best efforts. They had given me the gift of sobriety and the foundations of the new Brooke.

Thanks for letting me share.