My name is Michele and I am an alcoholic.

I remember my first drink so well. I did not like the way it tasted, but loved the effect. I was hooked! I grew up too quickly, had a bad childhood, and always felt as if I had to be in control and take care of everyone. That first drink allowed me to not be in control. I liked feeling numb, it distracted me from all the feelings I truly felt inside. I could not just take one drink, I needed several. I was a cheap alcoholic, since it didn't take much for me to get drunk. I found that those drinks gave me much needed confidence. Finally, it caught up with me and I lost everything. I dropped out of college, and drank even more over that. I stuffed all my feelings inside and stayed drunk. I was miserable. I no longer knew who that person was in the mirror. I finally snapped one night. I'd been staying with old friend who was in Al-anon and I did not know it. She planted the seed of AA for me. My last drink was a whole bottle of wine ... I don't know why the whole bottle, I just needed it badly. I walked into my first meeting and asked for help. I was angry, miserable, and lonely. People talked to me and told me to come back. I thought I didn't belong there. I was only twenty-two years old ... the youngest in the room, but I kept coming back, listened to others, and was willing to do anything from the very beginning. The desire to drink was quickly removed by a Power greater than myself. I have been here ever since. I'm glad I stayed around that five minutes more for the miracles to happen!

Thanks for letting me share.