Hi, my name is Joannie and I'm an alcoholic.

How very different the concept of what we want and what we need is. Yet I always thought the 'want' should come first. I think it came from the fact I was an only child, spoiled rotten, and brought up in a 'gimme' world. I never once thought my needs were important. They were always taken care of by doting parents. So actually it was no surprise when I grew up that the 'wants' came first. It was a shock to me that those wants were not all that great when I got them. Yes, I wanted a husband, white picket fence, and a bunch of kids. But God laughed and said, "OK!" He gave me a husband, and because I was in a hurry, I didn't pick the best of the lot ... not once, but twice. He gave me three beautiful children, and I am very grateful for them today. But I wasn't ready to be a mom, so I messed that up. The best part was I didn't start drinking until after they were born. The worst part was I started drinking when they were small and needed a mom. Yes, I got the house and fence, but it's a chain link, not picket, fence. But King Alcohol almost cost me even that. I was darn near out on the street. It is easy to see in hindsight that if I had asked God for His will for me, I may have done things differently. But that is neither here nor there today. Today, I have everything I need. It is only because I started to listen to my Higher Power, and not put my 'wants' up front. When I first got sober, I thought I deserved to have everything I wanted, went credit card crazy, and paid for that dearly. Today, I have lots of "stuff," and no, it didn't make me happy. Something that I needed, sobriety and AA, were free, and gave me more happiness and freedom than I ever remember. I have a world of gratitude today, and I have God and each and every one of you to thank for helping me stay sober one more day.

- Joannie